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⚝ Saki's Blog~

Just some of my longer writings that dont quite fit in my diary, talking about different projects im working on or have worked on. While also including some random, much longer rants.

These are more personal to me, so some may talk about rather sensitive topics, if you dont want to see that simply click off and move on!

For those who stayed, welcome to the little window to my mind. A few snippits of source code for your own viewing.

Also writing these are a pain imo, I already did my english credits and im still writing alot ;-;


Suffocating

Tags : Poem, Transgender, Dysphoria

Im going to start this with a poem made by MythosDythos (mythosdythos on discord) THIS IS NOT MY OWN POEM


I hate this suffocating masculinity

It feels darker than a new moon’s light

I just want to bask in femininity


It might be easier to achieve divinity

I just want to escape this eternal night

I hate this suffocated masculinity


It feels like its gone on for infinity

I just want to see the light

I just want to bask in femininity


It hurts my mind like zero divided by infinity

I just want to leave, take flight

I hate this suffocating masculinity


If I could achieve it, it would feel like divinity

Like floating in the heavens, nice and bright

I just want to bask in femininity


With my body, I have no affinity

It just feels like a blight

I hate this suffocating masculinity

I just want to bask in femininity




This poem I simply resonate with, the feeling of my masculinity is suffocating. It makes me want to simply vanish more than I'd like to admit, I dont really show how much it bothers me but in reality I absolutely HATE it with a burning passion. I want to bask in femininity but that is so far away it almost feels like a faint rumor of better days. I want to be percieved femininely but I simply don't believe I am. Sure im not really putting work towards it but just...everyone has their hopes and dreams. That is mine.

Languages

Tags : Language, Quarkish, Worldbuilding

One thing you may of noticed in the home page is that I've made multiple languages! Here I want to talk about them, starting with my cipher, which is currently unnamed but a few ideas I have are: "Shift Cipher" or "Sum Cipher". Here is the chart I made for encoding/decoding it!

Guide To My Cipher

The best way I can describe it is in a formula of sorts. b(+ or -)s where b = "Base" and s = "Shift". So something like A+2 would actually be C or G-1 would actually be F. A complicated and relatively hard to encode/decode without the chart or knowledge of how it functions. Something like A7A4A11A11A14 . A22A14A17A11A3 which only has bases of A actually means "Hello World". My other language I'll be talking about is by far my favorite, its name is Quarkish. The guide is here :

a - ⇱

b - ⇵

c - ⟳

d - ⤾

e - ⥥

f - ⥹

g - ⇴

h - ⥙

i - ⌯

j - ⌇

k - ⍀

l - ⍖

m - ⇶

n - ⍝

o - ⍜

p - ⏀

q - Ø

r - ⥉

s - ⍱

t - ⌆

u - ⍽

v - ⍦

w - ⎅

x - ※

y - ⊴

z - ≑

⠤ - " "

Its a rather simple language, where one symbol = one letter in english but when shown to other people its rather hard for people to even begin to understand. Especially since a space has its own symbol making text one large chunk. The reason for the space having a symbol is actually for encoders/decoders. Detecting a space is hard in at least python (what my encoder/decoder is in) so I gave it a symbol making it much easier. "Hello world" in this language would be ⥙⥥⍖⍖⍜⠤⎅⍜⥉⍖⤾! Also this is the one language I can actually type in because of a program I made that lets me easily switch between English and Quarkish.